Announcing…..Ontario!

Well, we finally made it. The big time. Ontario, California! This beautiful berg is located in San Bernardino County and is actually named after the province in Canada. Notable residents included musician Frank Zappa and….well that’s about it.

Seriously now- Legendary Bingo will be monthly (and hopefully soon- weekly) at Hamburger Mary’s Ontario beginning with our kick off event on Monday, September 21st! This is a brand new Mary’s and it is gorgeous. Everything is new so come out soon before drunk people ruin it.

Our first event (starring Bingo Boy & Roxy Wood) will benefit The Susan G. Komen 3 Day Walk For Breast Cancer and we will be back the very next Monday for Second Chances Animal Rescue.

More info below (including time, address and phone number for reservations) but please spread the word to all of your Inland Empire friends!

COME AND SEE US IN ONTARIO!

ontario-bingo

Other Things That Happened This Week-

Roxy’s drinking got out of control-

roxy-patron

She found this giant bottle of tequila and fondled it like it was someone offering her two front row seats to a Beyonce concert.

roxy-patron

And then she drank it like it was someone offering her two tickets to a Beyonce concert- with parking.

Bruce Vilanch came to bingo-

roxy bruce vilanch

And Roxy fondled him like….never mind. We love Bruce and it was nice catching up with him. Did you know that Brucie and I used to work on “Hollywood Squares” together? He was also one of our very first ballcalling guests many, many, many years ago.

Roxy formed her own singing group-

roxy-singing-group

She calls the group “Roxy Wood & Other People Who Aren’t Roxy Wood.” Just kidding. This group just showed up all dressed in white and looking fine so of course we had to get a photo of them. I think they may have been coming from church so Hamburger Mary’s seemed to be the next logical stop.

And finally- Sears owes me some money-

You remember Bingo Boy, don’t you?

Bingo boy gradient blue

Well- I was in Sears the other day (don’t laugh, I have a charge card) and saw this while walking through the girls department on my way to appliances-

sears

What the…? They stole my pose! This rip off “Bingo Boy” mannequin just stood there taunting me and saying “just try and sue us! We’re Sears!”

After I calmed down, I realized that this could be a great marketing opportunity for my Bingo Boy merchandise! Could you see it?

Let me show you!
Right? What little girl could resist a shirt with a positive message like this one!

horny-sears

Or this one!
Claim your power, girl! Tell the world who you are!

sears-bitch

Shoot- now they’re probably going to steal all of my marketing ideas. Just you wait Sears. Someday I too will have a catalogue just like you with merchandise like this-

sears-balls
So there.

And see you this week at BINGO!
xo, Bingo Boy


Legendary-Bingo

Here’s what’s coming up at Hamburger Mary’s Ontario!

Monday Night- September 21st – Starring Bingo Boy & Roxy Wood!
7 pm show benefiting-The Susan G. Komen 3 Day Walk!

Monday Night- September 28th-Starring Bingo Boy & Roxy Wood!
7 pm show benefiting-2nd Chances Animal Rescue!

HAMBURGER MARY’S – ONTARIO
3550 Porshe Way, Ontario Ca.
reservations for parties of 3 or more- 909-944-9400
Full menu and bar | All ages welcome | Giant free parking lot available!


Legendary-Bingo

Here’s what’s coming up in WeHo this week!

Wednesday Night- September 9th-Starring Bingo Boy & Roxy Wood!
7 pm show benefiting -AIDSWalk!
9 pm show benefiting -AIDS Project Los Angeles!

Sunday Night- September 13th-Starring Bingo Boy & Porsha Hayy!
6 pm show benefiting -The Leukemia/Lymphoma Society!
8 pm show benefiting -Team In Training!

HAMBURGER MARY’S – WEST HOLLYWOOD
8288 Santa Monica Blvd- At Sweetzer
reservations for parties of 3 or more- 323-654-3800
Full menu and bar | All ages welcome | Valet and street parking available


LB-Pasa-Edwin-Mills

Here’s what’s coming up in Pasadena!

Tuesday Night-September 22nd!
7 pm show benefiting-The Leukemia/Lymphoma Society!
Click on charity name for reservation site-

EDWIN MILLS (formerly Equator)- Pasadena Ca.
22 Mills Place- in historic Mills Alley across from Burke Williams
Must make a reservation to attend!
Full menu and bar | All ages welcome | Pay lot and street parking available

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